Friday, 30 January 2009
This was taken in mid-November, but I just got some of them back. I'm kind of digging it. It's to my "After Dark" (Tito & Tarantula's) routine.
I would like to get some more photos done in some of my other costuming. Keep for prosperity, you know?
Down one more pound. One pound away from 110, yeess! Since Eileen is now working right next to my gym, she said that maybe she would join. I am prodding her to do so. Then I would have a workout buddy and someone to guilt me into going regularly. Though she is already smokin' and has muscles.
We're supposed to go to Lollipop tomorrow night. I haven't seen Pinky in ages, and she and Rockstar Aaron will be spinning sweet tunes to groove to, heh. We'll go as long as it's not snowing. I hate walking a few miles in the snow, especially when I am not dressed for snow walking. We plan on taking the train downtown and walking everywhere so that I can embibe in a few and not have to worry about being the DD. Sweet.
Wednesday, 28 January 2009
I found that the Jillian Michaels DVD that I bought is available on demand on exercise tv. Oh well, I like it anyway and have no regret buying it. I think I will check out on demand from now on, and if I find something I really, really enjoy then I'll buy it since they change the videos quite often that are available on demand. I often forget that exercise tv is even there.
Working on the Valentine's burlesque costume right now. I would really much rather spend my time working on making costumes and clothes than my actual work. =\ I belive that when I am done with this one, I'll give costuming a break. I would like to make something that I can actually wear all the time and not just glitter and sequins and tear away stuffs. Although, if I plan on auditioning another act for the 80s show, there will be yet one more costume and props to make before March.
Target is having a great clearance on shoes. This past weekend, I bought three pairs of spectacular, retro looking heels. They were all under $6 each. Score! I have been shopping for dresses and skirts online there too. Great deals and some really, really cute finds! This past weekend I got all kinds of compliments on my $6 shoes and under $10 dresses. =)
Tuesday, 27 January 2009
I put in this dvd yesterday. I started on Level 1 and could barely get through ten minutes. Yes, I am super weak. I am going to try it again today. So far, though, I like it because it's fast paced, and you only really need hand weights and a mat. The moves are easy to follow and not a difficult style. I think I like that it challenges my body even on this the easiest of levels. I recommend it, and you can get it for a steal on Amazon.
I also got the Clean Eating Diet Cookbook and the Clean Eating Workout Book & DVD. I'm reading the workout book right now. I went through the cookbook this weekend and really liked a ton of what I saw. I may stick in the DVD to see what that workout looks like as well.
I am going to be pulling out all of the workout dvd's that I have that are collecting dust and giving them a try. Some, I have never even played!
I am down 2lbs so far, and I can definitely feel some tightening in areas. One of the girls who I had not seen in a few weeks told me that I definitely looked like I had lost some weight. YaaY!!
Saturday, 24 January 2009
Thursday, 22 January 2009
What a year the past was, yeah right. Had my miscarriage (had not thought I even wanted a spawn cuz I really don't have a fondness for the little tykes), found out that I have fibroids - add that to the endometriosis, found out a few more diagnosis too, none of which I will delve into here. I hate my job. Two people that I was friendly with have passed. I have lost site of anything that truly mattered. I am in a deep funk right now. The kind of funk that makes me think that packing a backpack and just taking off and not turning back is not such a crazy idea. I need something good to happen, something small but good.
Because self mutilation is always good in these situations, I emailed my tattoo artist friend and am setting up a time to go in and get more done.
I deal with stress badly. In the past I have dealt with anxiety and panic attacks when I worked in the actual office. The past couple of weeks have left me on edge.
It seems to the average person that I have a perfect job. I get to work from home. I work for the company that I have worked for since I was 18. Only now, I am "self-employed" and contracted since they are in New Orleans, and I am in Colorado. It has always been a very stress inclined job. Rush, rush, rush. For the most part my bosses do not plan or prioritize leaving everything until the last minute. It then falls on me to complete project drawings by the deadline. It is not unusual for me to receive a phone call saying, "We’re faxing you this survey. The client expects the drawing in 15 minutes." Always the impossible, always the phone calls, always the pushing. It has gotten to the point where I am afraid to leave my house, even to wander into the back yard because the sporadic, yet frantic needs until the work day is over, even if there is no project on my desk.
At times, it really isn’t so bad. Regular paced work given to me to be done in a normal manner. Most times though it is the race. I absolutely abhore it. Yet, I am petrified to quit. I have no other skills. I really would not want to continue doing AutoCad with another company because I do not enjoy it. I have no clue what I would want to do with my life. Almost 36 years old and clueless about what I want.
This is why I was talking about consulting a life coach. The prices though are *ouch*. Trying to take some quiet time to reflect each day, but I get more and more confused. ~sigh~
My expectations are too large, I know. I cannot have a perfectly scheduled or structured life. I like free time, time to exercise, dance, draw, walk the dogs, garden. I know it’s too much to look for in another career. So, I sit and crumble a little more each day.
Wednesday, 21 January 2009
In hopes of not putting a dumbbell through my monitor, I decided to actually use them for their intended purposes. I have weak little girly arms. Yes, 5lb dumbbells kicked my J-Lo booty. I am weak. I should retire my "Call the Vet because these Puppies are Sick" tee. Yes, that's it and I do own it. =)
Why do you ask was I going to throw a dumbbell through my monitor? It's that wondrous thing called employment and the idiots with whom I am employed. Discouragement. Pondering what do I want to be when I grow up. Same things pop into my head. You know, the female version of Indiana Jones, a mad scientist, a librarian, an independent toy store owner with attached vintage clothing, fitness person. ~sigh~ So, I exercise to relieve the anxiety.
I did look up the group classes offered at my gym (which I have not been to in six months) that is walking distance from my house. I picked two to go to for the rest of the week. One is at 5:30am, the other on a weekend morning. Maybe getting out of the house and around people will help some. I even debated quitting my job and applying for the reception/check-in job there. How high stress could that really be? Plus, you would probably get discounts, haha.
On a side note, I am also discouraged with my burley-ness. It seems to be getting competitive for shows, auditions, spots. I hate that feeling. I do not like competing with people who I truly like. It sort of takes the fun out of it. Plus, I am reduced to feeling like I did in high school. Boooo. I think I may not do the competing thing after this show, and just schedule myself for regular shows. I would hate for this to become something negative for me when it is pretty much a positive and enjoyable hobby. Right now, I have quite a few acts (single, duet & group) to work on, plus costumes and props. Nerve wracking, I tell you. Yes, best to simplify and continue to be happy in it. So after the next few months obligations, relaxation time!
I am actually looking forward to our getaway with family in Crested Butte in a few weeks. No phones, no faxes, no obligations, just fires, snow, cocktails!
Hopefully they are tried as adults as this was not their first arrest, robbery, otherwise.
Thank goodness these mothers were responsible enough to call and turn them in when they saw the wanted posters.
Tuesday, 20 January 2009
Her last moments
NOLA is such a small town. I just found out that one of the attorneys at my firm was on the scene immediately after Wendy was shot. She told me that Wendy was still holding her cocktail, even after having been shot in the back. She said that Wendy was standing up, asking what had happened and then said that she couldn't catch her breath so she sat on the curb and placed her drink on the sidewalk. She then laid down, trying to catch her breath. It took the ambulance nearly 20 mins to arrive and at that point, Wendy was already in shock.
The officer on the scene was apparently very young and was yelling at everyone to stay back. Even when a doctor approached the scene, he had to convince the officer to let him try to help.
Apparently there was some confusion as to what happened. People thought that she had just fallen and did not realize she had actually been shot because she was so composed, even able to perform a task like setting down her cocktail.
I don't know why I feel the need to write this down. I just need to get it out before i freak out and over analyze every single fucking thing.
I am so fucking pissed off. This is a failure on so many different levels.
I am praying for the safety of my friends. I am praying for the future of this city.
Body: At The Cost of a Life
January 18th, 2009 by Lord David
It’s Sunday, a little past noon and I just got the call. Wendy, the bartender at Aunt Tiki’s on Lower Decatur, was shot and killed in an armed robbery at Governor Nichols and Dauphine Street last night, about 8pm.
This is above the ‘Bourbon Street Safety Line’ it’s true, but this neighborhood is where the dog park is, a residential area, a block or so from Cosimo’s. It was 8 o’clock on a Saturday night, a time when couples should be walking out to dinner, and locals are heading home from work, or out for the evening.
Apparently, Wendy walked up on a friend who was already being robbed at gun point, and was robbed as well, and then shot.
In the back.
She died shortly afterwards, on the way to, or at, the hospital.
While all of us who knew her, myself among them, are horrified at this terrible, terrible murder, it doesn’t end there. I’ve posted a series of columns here, triggered by Bill Sothern’s editorial about getting robbed in the Marigny, relating how some young black kids with a small semi-automatic pistol robbed him and his wife and friends. Upon finding out the next day that the robbers were using his wife’s cell phone, he went to the police.
He says in his post that;
” I was barely able to hold the attention of the police officer at the desk as I explained the evidence that I had discovered and suggested that, so long as the phone was on, maybe they could even locate the user. She took a message but again, no one called me. I called again and again over the following days and left messages for the detective assigned to the case and even called the district lieutenant when those went unanswered. As of this writing, no one has called me to follow up on the calls made from the phone or, as far as I know, made any efforts to investigate the two potentially lethal armed robberies that occurred that night.
When a friend of mine was robbed New Years Eve by junior thugs matching this description, I called for an outcry to the NOPD, hoping to make them act before this went to much farther.
Wendy’s killers also match this same description.
There we have it. A direct link and patheticly sad story of inaction, followed by continued robbery and now the death of a young local woman. Had the 5th district jumped on the cell phone number and the number called, perhaps this would have led to an arrest, or at least left the perpatrators less bold, less likely to be drunk with horrible power and ready to kill.
There is no bringing Wendy back. Her life was ended brutally on an outing, relatively early on a Saturday night. She was robbed of every minute of every day, forever. They took all she had or ever would have, everything she would ever be.
The thought that this occured because somebody was too fucking lazy to do their job, too politically oriented to do real police work, too interested in “keeping the New Olreans Brand out there”, makes me so angry I can hardly control myself.
Warren Riley and C. Ray Nagin, you were warned. Bill Sothern told the city about this first incident with a story in the Times-picayune. I’ve been hammering away at Humid City, and sending letters to any newspaper or periodical that will listen. Now a local friend is dead, shot down in the street like an animal.
What’s it gonna take?
How many more New Olreanians will die this year, because some cop just had to take a call on their cell, or stand around the parking lot, showing off their new car stereo, because another citizen was treated like a criminal for trying to give the police some information or report a crime, because the Police Superintendent is on the board of so many quasi-political groups that he can’t or won’t do his fucking job?
I don’t want to see a news sound bite of Warren Riley in perfect make-up, talking about imperfect family problems and better education to prevent crime. Billy Sothern showed up at the Station House with a solid clue and was ignored. Now Wendy is dead.
I want to see Warren Riley’s resignation, I suppose, and it would be nice to go out for coffee and ice cream after dark without worrying about getting fucking killed, but mostly, I’m sure Wendy’s friends and relatives would like her to be around for Sunday Brunch.
She won’t, however, because she’s dead.
You let this happen, you rotten sons of bitches.
We’ve seen your absolute failure in absolute clarity, and at the cost of a life.
There’s nothing more to say, right now.
And besides, we’ll be mourning the Death of Another Friend.
Rest in Peace, Wendy.
And I’m sorry.
I’m sorry that some stupid, lazy bastards let this happen.
You are not forgotten.
Friday, 16 January 2009
I still am going to make room for my cocktails, but only on the weekends. Sam and I hit the grocery last night where we stocked up on lots of fruits, veggies, lean proteins, lean meats and seafood. Of course, our fridge and pantry were almost completely bare anyway, haha.
Back to work. There are many projects, impossibly due on Tuesday. I sense that I may have to work a little over the weekend.
Thursday, 15 January 2009
Wednesday, 14 January 2009
Though I adore and love my husband, he's response to everything is "Do what makes you happy."
I have no clue any more what makes me happy.
Is this the beginning of a mid-life crisis? Okay, so I am only 35.
I need some changes, but I have no clue what they should be or how to go about making them.
Tuesday, 13 January 2009
Why are women so catty toward each other? I admit, I fall into the gossip trap, being catty at times. My descent happens most times when someone has done a discourtesy to me or a friend who was not deserving. Even then, I am so disappointed in myself.
Oh universe, help me to not care what others think of me.
There are periods where I can completely be fine with who I am and how I look. Why can I not do that all the time? Perhaps I should indulge in I'm o.k., You're o.k. to unlock the secret of my issues?
Is it because I am entrenched in a hobby that is full of glamorous, stunning women, and I am the clown of the group?
I try and convince myself that I am just as worthy of acceptance as any of them.
When the claws become exposed around me, I do sometimes notice it is because even they are feeling less than what they appear on the outside.
I am going to start to take a step back before being sucked in. I am happiest when I am free to be my inner dork.
Monday, 12 January 2009
Thursday, 8 January 2009
I am really, really trying to make changes, one by one. I have gotten rid of almost all of my plastic kitchen stuffs. The only thing remaining are my storage containers with lids. Those I will hold on to much longer. I took a ceramic pitcher that I used to keep near my stove will all of my cooking utensils down. I am now using that for my tea. I substituted one of the many wide mouth glass vases that I have to hold my big spoons, tongs, spatulas and such. Also, I stole an idea from a restaurant to hold water in the fridge. I boil tap water for drinking and such. Now, I funnel the water into old wine bottles and pop them in the fridge. It is a cute presentation, and I am reusing the pretty bottles too!
Tomorrow night, some of the burlesque ladies and I are meeting up for Drag Queen Bingo. Yes, you read that right! What could be more fun I ask you? In the spirit, I am wearing my new glasses and my finest mix-matched polyester outfit. If you are going to do something, do it right, right? I am ready for fun and silliness.
Tuesday, 6 January 2009
This is me being Ms. Suzie Homemaker. I prepared these six-spiced maple cornish hens for the company we were supposed to get. No one showed. Sam had cornish hen the next several days. I have so many ideas to spice up this kitchen...
Me and the pups in front of our fantastic tree! Even though it is fuzzy you can see Tofu the Vegan Zombie that Sam got for me under the tree.
Friday, 2 January 2009
I tried Celestial Seasonings Holiday Teas. Candy Cane Lane and Sugar Cookie Sleigh Ride are so delicious and comforting. No caffeine, no sugar, no calories and yummy! I highly recommend you try them if you have not already. I think that I may become an addict.
We walked on up to the pub New Year's Eve, first stopping into the tattoo shop to see our friend and tell her that she and her hubby should join us.
I thought that I would start out slow, a glass of chardonnay with a glass of water between. The place thins out and a guy on guitar plays and sings. He is actually pretty good. The bartender, my hubby and I begin to sing a little. One more glass of wine please and another water. This one goes slightly quicker. Okay, so let me switch to brew. One, two... I'm hungry and sleepy. I look at the clock, and it is only 10:45pm. Our friends had not shown up yet. The pub is a ghost town. I begin talking to strangers. I am sleepy. I ruin the night by saying that I am ready to go home. We walk home, I make grilled cheeses and I pass out, all before the toll of twelve. I did not even hear the fire works or commotion. I suck.